Monday, May 28, 2007

A Swift Kick To The Groin

Well this is the feeling I was left with after my day at Sedona.

On my first day in Arizona, I drove through Sedona on my way to Flagstaff. I wasn't sure what I was going to do there, but I at least wanted to see the famous Red Rocks. Also, supposedly Sedona is one of the world's metaphysical centers, with lots of powerful vortexes and holy energized spots. I wasn't sure what kind of energy I was supposed to feel, but I'm not the type to believe in that type of stuff anyway.

The Red Rocks of Sedona are pretty spectacular. It was so different than anything I had ever seen before. But after a while, the scenery gets to be kind of "ok, how many red rocks can I look at before being bored out of my mind?" You really have to do something like hike around or take a jeep tour. In my case, I opted for an afternoon of mountain biking. I'll admit, I was a bit hesitant because I hadn't been on a bike in a few years and had only gone serious mountain biking once before. But I just went for it and had a good and very sweaty time.

So after renting a bike and deciding which route I should take with the shop owner, I headed out with my 30 year old bad self, hitting the trails as if I had a lot of anger to let out, which I didn't really.

I was on the "Broken Arrow Trail" which was described to me as an intermediate trail. In retrospect, I should have picked an easier trail, but this one was the closest to the shop, and I didn't want to have to commute that far.

I was having a pretty good time. The first part kicked my ass because it was pretty much a series of uphills the entire time. But soon it leveled out and was a mix of short uphills and downhills. I was taking jumps, but pretty slowly, so picture a much more lame image in your head than it sounds.

On one part of the trail was a pretty steep and long downhill section. I had been biking for a while and was gaining my confidence. I started my descent and began to pick up speed, much more quickly than I really wanted to. But I didn't want to stop. I bent my knees and elbows, focused on my path, and got off my seat a bit to brace myself.

I had made a mistake and didn't quite realize the amount of huge rocks down the hill. They might as well have been boulders, and I realized I'd have to stop. I press the breaks hard, and BAM! I was in the air for a split second, but it might as well have been 10 minutes. I stopped right in front of a rock and it came up fast. While I was in the air, my legs kind of compressed from the weight of my body, and that's about the exact time I land. Boom! Let's just say that at the moment, the "junk" in my groin area were not ideally positioned for the landing.

I hit my groin HARD! I landed right against the center bar of my bike connecting my seat to the handle bars. Oh my fucking god. I thought I was going to black out. My bike tumbled and I was rolling on the ground. Holy crap. Was I in pain!

After a few minutes, I finally got back on my bike and rode some more and walked a lot more. I was pretty parched too, similar to how I felt a couple years ago in this post. Biking in that altitude was really a lot to handle.

The end result of all this? Scrapes, bloody legs and huge ass bruise on my inner left thigh. But at least I didn't do any more serious damage.


Todd HellsKitchen said...

Red Rock canyons, and their ilk, in the desert, are best seen in air conditioned motorized vehicles with ample hydraulic suspension. Ya know?

tim said...

OMG. How butch of you! I agree with todd. Next time, get something air conditioned. :)

Ming_the_Merciless said...

Why would anyone put themselves through pre-historic conditions when one could sit at home in a temperature controlled room with a beer in one hand and the Met vs. Yankee on the tele??

Disclaimer: I don't drink beer nor do I watch baseball on TV.

Michael said...

I'm sorry about your nasty fall, hope you're feeling better! See, that's what ya get for bein' all butch and whatnot. ;-)

:: jozjozjoz :: said...


TCho said...

Ah. I like the outdoors, Ming. Lol.

Christopher said...

Here's to a speedy groin recovery...and is it wrong that the picture you posted above is turning me on a little?

GrooveTheory said...

I would say, I'd kiss the boo-boo, but I know you don't like those jokes. Oh wait, I said it anyway :)