Why Are Guys Such A Pain In The Ass?

I don't write about my romantic adventures too much for a variety of reasons. First, my romantic life is virtually non-existent. I, long ago, got really fed up with the game-playing, the second guessing of everything about me and that I could possibly offer, and the plethora of losers out there. This experience didn't help either.

The second reason is that I just got got really tired of talking about it and thinking about it and obsessing about it. I even got tired of talking with my single friends about how they're single and looking for that special guy or girl. I just made a conscious decision to stop thinking about it and do the things I enjoy and enjoy them as much as I can--cook, work out, travel, play tennis, etc.

As all my readers know, I had been talking for a while with this British guy. We got on well, engaged in lots of innocent flirting and always had a lot to talk about. Things seemed to be going well. We liked each other a lot. He was creeping into my head more and more each day. So everything seemed rosy, and I have to admit that I was starting to get those funny feelings whenever I thought about him. But there were some warning signs, which I chose to ignore, perhaps because I liked him too much, or maybe because I under-estimated how much I liked this guy. I kept telling myself that this really wasn't a good idea because he lives in another city, had some "being out" issues, and seemed married to his job, which served as excuses for him being less considerate than what I would say is standard.

For example, one time we were talking on the phone, and his phone just cut off all of a sudden. I was like, "WTF?" I tried calling him back, but his phone went straight to voicemail. I gave up after a couple more tries, and just went to bed. I kind of expected an explanation the next day. Well, actually I was expecting an email or an IM that night, but I didn't hear from him until four fucking days later, and he didn't even mention it. Now, if I were talking with someone, and my phone cut off, I would be mortified, and would explain right way somehow and some way.--like send a short email saying my phone died or something like that. My British friend didn't provide any of that, and didn't even acknowledge it, and finally I asked, and he said something about his phone battery running out. Huh? Why can't you just plug in your phone?

This week, though, he got his final strike. My British friend was in New York yesterday. We had talked on Friday about his upcoming visit and talked about making some plans--dinner or something. I didn't hear from him for the rest of the weekend. Then on Tuesday, I IM'ed him, and no answer. I called him, and left a voicemail. No return call. I sent an email, saying "Hey, did you make it to New York?" No reply.

Now I know he was in New York, and I know that he was around when I IM'ed him because of his changing "status" on my IM client. I'm no James Bond, but I can figure that out.

I fucking HATE when a guy tries to put on a disappearing act and completely leave you high and dry and ignores you, without giving any sort indication of where he stands. It ANNOYS THE SHIT OUT OF ME. If you're old enough to date, you're old enough to tell a guy "No thanks." Don't put the burden on me to figure out how you feel.

I'm really disappointed. I mean I wasn't like head-over-heels in love with him, even at the time when I wrote my funny post about my seducing tactics. I was trying to be pragmatic, realist, level-headed and all those sorts of things. But this whole experience just makes me bitter about guys in general...again.